Monday, June 16, 2008

I'm Still Alive! 9w5d

Wow! I can't believe it has been a week since I posted last! I didn't intentionally stay away that long it's just that every time I would think of posting a blog I didn't know what to say. I hesitate to continually talk about the pregnancy, but that's what my life is about right now. This started out as an infertility blog and it only seems right to continue it as a pregnancy after infertility blog. So, I hope all of you are not getting sick of hearing about my pregnancy. Of course I will continue to update you on other aspects of my life as well (because we all know how exciting my life is!) So, here's whats been going on with me:
  • Pregnancy: I feel okay. I'm tired most of the day, like right to the bone tired! I still feel sick in the mornings but it is better when I eat. I also noticed that the earlier I go to bed the better I feel when I wake up. I am still bloated and it appears it is here to stay. I have been wearing loose shirts in an effort to hide my pudge but it's no use. I have my first OB appointment tomorrow. The nurse called me last week and decided to do the intake interview over the phone. So I will go to the doctor at 3:00 instead of 2:00. I asked her if he would do an ultrasound and she said yes. I was so relieved to hear that! I just want to know that everything is okay. I am still terrified that something is going to go wrong. I am so scared that they are going to do an u/s and not see a heartbeat, it is my worst fear. I worry about every little thing. When I didn't feel sick on Saturday when I woke up I immediately worried that something was wrong and continued to worry all day. My Mom told me I worry too much but she doesn't understand. I really do hope that at some point I can relax a little more, but for now the anxiety is still very real for me. It's almost like I still feel like it is too good to be true, some sort of sick joke, that someone is going to take it all away from me. I don't know how I am going to cope during the 4 weeks until my next ob appointment. I thought about getting a doppler but Dh thinks it will make me more worried if I can't find a heartbeat. I'm not sure. Lastly, I do have a question for those of you who have been to an ob appointment. At what point does my husband come in? Does he stay outside during the exam and then I have them call him in for the u/s or does he stay in the room during the whole thing?
  • Baby Shower: Not mine silly! We have a long way to go before we start worrying about those things. The baby shower I went to on Saturday, the one I made the diaper cake for. First of all, my diaper cake turned out beautiful! I was so proud of it when I was finished! I keep on forgetting to have Dh load the pictures off the camera, maybe I will remember tonight. Dh said I should make them and sell them. The shower was for my step sister in-law. She looked awful! I know it sounds mean but she just looked miserable. She was very very bloated and had dark circles under her eyes. She still has until the end of July too! Btw, I still hate baby showers! I still felt uncomfortable, I still feel like I am an impostor. But luckily this one was very small and no stupid games or anything like that.
  • This Weekend: Dh wants to go back to the farm house in Western Maryland this weekend to finish putting the roof on the porch. Truth be told, I don't really want to go. Don't get me wrong, I love it up there, it is beautiful. However, there is no a/c in the house and the bed is very uncomfortable and small. Those things combined make it very hard for me to get a good nights sleep and if I don't sleep well I don't feel well. That combined with the fact that our house is filthy and needs to be cleaned big time. The yard needs to be mowed, and the garden needs weeding. The house needs a good cleaning top to bottom, our laundry is out of control and the refrigerator needs cleaning out badly. I don't want to keep Dh from helping and I know he wants to go but I can't stand our house the way it is. I am so exhausted by the time I get home from work that it is hard for me to do much. I really need his help. He plays softball on Tuesday and Wednesday so those days are out. So if we went to the farm we would have to clean the whole house today because we would need to pack on Wednesday. I don't know what to do, I'm just not feeling up to it and I really need a clean house again.

Well, that's about it for now. I will update tomorrow after my ob appointment. Please pray that all is well with little Doozer!

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would wish you, above all, a carrier of a new life into the world, wish you the ability to nurture your peace within, nurture deep relaxation. I know not the medical reasons for this (you might ask your health provider), but I can testify as to the benefit of practicing a deep relaxation method in preparation for stressful events, or stressful activity, i.e., childbirth.

It wouldn't necessarily be too late I suppose. Deep breathing is one technique.

I wish you and your husband a very good (fullest term possible) birth.

Alan

Martha@A Sense of Humor is Essential said...

Dear Mo, the diaper cake sounds beyond cute and I'm hoping to make one for my neighbor who is due her miracle baby this July. I have to research instructions, you've inspired me to try my first one. Sorry your step in laws are not appreciative. Re.MD appointment, your DH should be able to be in the room with you as much as you want and feel comfortable with. Re.your parent's nicotine infested house, it increases your baby's risk of Asthma, SIDS, among other nasties. The smoke clings to clothing, skin, drapes, and walls like sap from a tree. Please take good care and I'm stopping by DH's blog to ask him to stay home and look after his bride and baby this weekend. The farm can wait.

popcorn sally said...

You absolutely have to put your foot down about letting your child be around smokers. You just can't let it happen. You worked too hard to get this far. Not only should s/he not be around smokers, s/he shouldn't be around places where smokers are or hang out. Your parents will just have to visit you at your house. Was that too blunt? Sorry. But good luck with everything!

Andy said...

WOW, you are busy! I have no advise about the smoking stuff other then to stick to your guns! Sometimes people need you to be blunt: We will not bring the baby here because of the smell. It's just not healthy for him/her.

And see where that takes you.

Good luck!

Stace said...

Can't wait to hear the newest updates tomorrow!!

And you have to post pictures of the diaper cake! I'm very curious how it turned out!! :)

sara said...

Thanks for the update, I was wondering how you were doing. I'll keep you and the little doozer in my thoughts and prayers for a good appointment tomorrow. As far as the husband and the OB appointment, I think pretty much if your husband wants to go in for the whole thing he should. Mine finally went to the first appointment last week, plus he was there at the hospital for my cerclage. But he went in for the whole appointment last week, they don't mind.

I hope you get some rest this weekend, and don't work too hard. You're cooking a baby in there mama!

Miss Feisty said...

Hola from NCLM :)

Glad that your pregnancy is going well (aside from the expected MS) :)

That sucks that they were unappreciative of the gift...maybe her stinky attitude is why she looks like crap? Ok, mean, I know! I'm just sayin!

My parents are also chainsmokers & I have made it very clear that if/when we have children, they will not visit them at their house. The health of my child is too important. My dad doesn't believe in the second hand smoke stuff...but my mom knows I am serious. You can tell them how you feel & then it is up to them to make the choice (hopefully the right one!)

Take care :)

Adriane said...

Good luck at your appt tomorrow. I'm sure it will go fine. All of your worries are so completely normal. I'm still worried at every single ultrasound.

My husband has gone to every appt with me and always goes in from the beginning. I guess it may depend on your Dr's office, but when they call my name we just both get up and go in there. (I make him turn around when they weigh me.)

Sorry the diaper cake didn't get the accolades it deserved. I would have been hurt, too! Oh, and the smoking...that's tough. Especially when it's not your house - hard to tell people to not smoke in their own home; however, when the baby comes and you don't want to bring them over there, it's your choice. You're the Mama! And, I don't blame you at all!

Hope you feel better soon.

My_Herstory said...

It's nice to hear from ya! Happy 9 and a bit wks!!

Kim said...

I think you should tell your mom no baby at her house if there is smoke of any kind there - old or new! I was so happy when NJ passed the no smoking law in public places indoors. We avoided some of our favorite eateries because we would come home smelling like smoke. There is nothing worse than a baby that smells like an ashtray! Hope all goes well at the appt! nclm

nancy said...

I think your title needs to be 9w5d, not 8w5d. Unless you are going backwards!

Wow, good luck with the smoking thing. Good they are smoking outside, but I just don't know what to do about the inside. I don't know how bad that leftover smoke is for us. I definitely couldn't deal - smells are SO weird to me. I'm too super sensitive.

CJ said...

I wouldn't bring my babies over to anyone's home that smelled like smoke, mother or not. If she wants to see the babies, she should come to your house. I am sorry. Cigarette smoke is bad. Totally against it. SO you were NOT being unreasonable to ask that of your mother. She should know and understand.